when it's long lost in your face

This dress was given to me last year by the owner of a coffee shop I used to frequent. His mother got it in Egypt- I think that's the story. It's brown silk with amazing metallic silver embroidery. I put it in the closet when he gave it to me and completely forgot about it.

I've put this dress in the costume portion of my closet but I've still never even tried it on until today. I finally gave it a shot and it fits this busty gal wonderfully. I'm not sure if I'll wear it for anything other than a costume because its kind of boho-granny-ish. I feel like it'll work for an older lady, you know? Does that make sense?

Of course I had to pair it with my amazing Vixy leopard boots and aqua blue lips inspired by the super cute young eccentric blogger Zoe of Girl with the Flower.

The makeup is my favorite $1 eye shadow sticks by LA Colors. The sticks come in sooo many colors and I'm on a mission to collect them all. They suck as eye shadow but work perfectly for my constant need for face paint (parties an events, WFW, "just because" dress up time, etc.) and they're easy to clean off.

smeeeearrrr...

Tonight I made some super herby turkey burgers and accidently made an eggy... sperm...

The patties were loaded with ground rosemary, basil and purple onion. I topped them with mozzarella, egg, tomato, baby spinach, baby bella mushrooms and a pesto mayo lemon sauce I invented.

Well, now it's time to bring this post to a close. I've got a super fussy three month old baby demanding my attention. Have a good night!

so what if I like pretty things...

Here. We. Go! Here's a wee bit from the week.

Friday my husband asked me if I was interested in a low maintenance pet and I said, er sure. He stuck out his hand to reveal a teeny tiny ugly little baby turtle that he had rescued after nearly stepping on him at a gas station parking lot.

Ugly? Yes, but there's just something about a baby anything that makes a woman squee with delight. He was so tiny!! But his reptilian markings reminded me too much of a snake (which I am horribly terrified of) so I asked my husband to let him go near the pond on the property. Bye bye baby turtle!

Saturday I finally got to spend my $20 gift card to Michael's Arts & Crafts Store. The gift card was a late birthday present from a new friend and boy was I stoked! $20 can go a long way at Michael's if you know where to look. 

#1 An awesome sticker book. I'm tickled pink that I found it because I was totally thinking, hm, I haven't had stickers in years- and then, hey! A sticker book!

#2 Felt owl mini clothes pins

#3 Circus giraffe memo pad

#4 I've been needing a blue ink pad for months now

#5 Cute birdy blank greeting cards

#6  $1 circus animal rubber stamps

#7 Owl light switch cover

#8 acrylic paints on sale 4 for $2

#9 sponge brushes- I have a nasty habit of reusing these until they're gross and crumbly

#10 Another light switch cover

I also went shopping for a dress for the NY wedding in June. Sorry about the weird blurriness, I think a cloud passed by outside or something. I got this dress at Ross for $10. I was looking for something kind of plain but unique so I can dress it up any way I like. I fits super weird thanks to my massive bosom but I'm still experimenting with ways to make it work.

I'm pretty sure I want to wear this sequined cardi-shrug with it... but I also want to wear a hat or a giant massive fascinator.

I considered wearing this hat with the outfit. This is the only hat I own. It was my grandmother's. Before her funeral a few years ago, all the ladies in the family got dibs on one of her hats to wear to the service (she was a hat lady) . I chose this one. It's way too thick and heavy for an outdoors garden wedding so I think I'll pass on that. Plus I'm old fashioned and I believe your hat should match your shoes and I don't have fuchsia shoes so, it's a no go.

I also want to wear gloves. I completely forgot about gloves as accessories until I spotted this pair in Bella-Wella-bo-Bella's Etsy shop. I was like, mmmm....gloves? YES! Now they're mine!! I would love to wear them for the wedding, but I picture the outfit with gloves with a lace trim around the wrist....

So I ordered some from Ebay for $1... plus some other $1 goodies that haven't gotten here yet.

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When all of my jewelry and other accessories come in, I'll put together a few versions of the outfit and maybe let you all vote on the best one? Heck, I might just go for something different all together. I'm ooooone fickle lady.

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So how was your week??

video killed the Renaissance star

Wednesday I met up with my sister for sushi with her friend Tiara. Tiara was in town for business and my sister was super anxious for me to meet her. Turns out, Tiara's like our long lost little sister. Her offbeat humor and wackiness matches ours perfectly. 

This is my sister by the way. I don't think you all have met her yet. So here she is, with me being weird awesome behind her.

We are sisters indeed.

During our meal, I know we made the other customers mildly comfortable with our loudness and laughter over our "Charlie Murphy meets Rick James" impersonations - but it was fuuuun....

 ...and delicious.

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I usually put my photos in a little collage to make loading easier for people with slower internet connections, buuut I'm in a bit of a hurry. Sorry!

Tuesday, me and my crew (The Right Handed Pygmies) worked the Chick-Fil-A Mother Son Date Knight. It was such a cute event. Part of the restaurant was decorated to look like the inside of a castle. There was a knighting ceremony and free limo rides- HOLLAH! 

They named the cow "Sir Eat Mor Chikn". Love it.

Here's me and some of my crew. We just couldn't get this photo right! Every photo I've seen of us in this pose, none of us are looking at the camera!  

 These three aren't members of the Right Handed Pygmies but they are AWESOME people. The guy in the middle is Clint and that's his teen son and daughter on either side of him. Clint makes and sells this leather armor and it is beyond amazing!! I asked Clint to come out to the event in his armor to help add to the fun and he agreed to it with no hesitation! Such a good guy! His wife helped me watch River as I worked. She was soooooooo sweet.

Check out Clint's store Oristian Subculture here.

 Here's one of the only full photos of me in garb.

 And me and a fellow Right Handed Pygmy, German cutie Lexy. 

So how was YOUR week???? HMM????

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Oh yeah. I'm doing a bit of spring cleaning for my Etsy store. Just use code SPRINGTIME to receive 20% off your purchase!

Wacky Fashion Wednesday

Today is the day!

It's WACKY FASHION WEDNESDAY!

In case you're new to this craziness, WFW is where I recreate terrible runway fashions made entirely from items found in my home.

Today's runway look is:

"Ski Vacation Sunburn"

You packed your gloves. You packed your hat. Your skis are ready, but... you forgot the sunscreen?

I kind of had to cheat on this one! The shirt and sweater that I am wearing are stark white but they came out yellow in the photos. No amount of color editing would fix it, so I used a "smile whitening" tool to make them white again. I'm so clever.

There almost wasn't a WFW this week again. I just came home from a lending my Renaissance persona to an event called "Mother Son Date Knight" at Chick-Fil-A this evening and I am pooped! All I had to do was stand around and look pretty but I was just plain exhausted after doing that for nearly four hours in layers of brocade, pearls and crinoline. 

Makeup

LA Colors lipstick in "Retro Red"

Under shirt

"Under armor" atheletic shirt. Found.

Sweater

Borrowed from mom for my wedding reception, never returned.

I actually like what the model is wearing in the photo above. I think the outfit is pretty cool. I'm not sure if I would wear it myself, but I definitely wouldn't frown upon anyone rocking this ensemble. I might take a double take at someone with lipstick completely coating their face though- but, hey, if that's what makes them happy....

I, however, wasn't too happy with the lipstick all over my face. I mean, it was a blast putting it on (like playing sloppy dress-up with mommy's makeup) but after just a few minutes my pores began to scream bloody murder. As you can see in the photo above, that's not the shine of the lipstick, that's sweat!

Oh, the price you have to pay to be a freak. :Sigh: I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Puting my warpaint on!

What monstrosity of a catwalk design will I recreate next week? Stay tuned to see!

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Don't forget to follow me on Bloglovin!

sneaky peeky/maybe baby

Today I took some pics of an outfit for Melanie's VOGOFF. I'm not quite sure if I'll submit the photos or not because #1 I think the outfit could stand to be a little more "freaky" and #2 I've got a wee babe and a busy husband so I had to take the photos myself in my house- boring! I'm definitely going to submit something. I'm just not sure if it'll be this particular outfit... (I'm not going to show you the whole thing because I want it to be a surprise if I make it in the zine!) But I will tell you I was going for a punk rock disgruntled housewife look and I will show you this lil' video of me unglamming myself after taking my pics. 

Enjoy, you sexy thangs you!

PS. Thank you all for the sweet birthday wishes!

it's my party and I'll cry if I want to

Yesterday was the most uneventful birthday I've ever had. I would love to write a long angsty post about how depressed I am about the whole thing but wallowing in my woes would just make it worse. Plus no one likes to read unhappy crap- I know I sure don't. So I'll just keep this brief  about why my birthday sucked so much. 

First, none of my immediate family called, emailed or even texted me to wish me a happy birthday- no gifts, no cards- nothing. I don't know why. 

My husband declared yesterday that we couldn't afford to go out for seafood like I wanted but said he'd think of something for us to do... eh, he didn't... So I spent the evening moping about washing dishes and halfheartedly fiddling around on Pinterest. 

The first half of my birthday started off rather promising though. Packages started being delivered to my door one after another. Even though only one was an actual birthday gift, I was stoked to get these packages in such good timing. I received a birthday check from my mother-in-law, a long awaited Ebay purchase finally came in along with a cute little froggy tea infuser giveaway prize from Tilda of Tea With Squirrels.

 It's been raining so much that this package was mushy and all the stamps began to peel off. These are my ear weights from Malaysia! Yay!

 Also, the day before yesterday a gift for River (from my Aunt) came in. River's gifts are my gifts so I'll count that as one. It's a play pen with a raised level to keep younger babies in. Flip the little bassinet over and it's a changing station! Cool!

Oh and how can I forget? My sis-in-law got me a pack of Shiner Bock which is one of my favorite beers.

Everyone knows that the way to a Hollie's heart is with good beer.

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Have you ever had a crappy birthday? Dish! Dish!

today I'm gonna party like it's 1985

28 years ago today I was born in the hallway of the Herman Hospital in Houston, TX at 5:41am. All the rooms at the hospital were occupied so they parked my mother on a stretcher in the hallway of the maternity ward. Her water broke all over the floor and a nearby janitor said to her, "You need some help, don't you?"

Minutes later my mother reached down and felt my little head emerging...  I came out, stood up and said, "I'm here and I'm FABULOUS!!" Still wet with birthing slime, I put on some little tap shoes and danced along to an Earth Wind and Fire song that had been stuck in my head since conception. The end.

Authors note: I was not named Hollie because I was born in the hallway.

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So what am I going to do today on this glorious Hollieday? ::sigh::

no WFW this week

Sorry folks. No Wacky Fashion Wednesday today. Why? I've been super tired aaaaaall day... all week actually. I'm not sure why. Maybe too much gin and novel reading at night and too much coffee and cleaning in the morning? I think I need to start exercising or eating better or something.... psshhhhh HAHAHAHAHA. No.

So to make up for my shameful lack of blogging responsibility, here are some of me and Caleb's engagement photos (February 2009). Sorry for the poor quality on some of these, I copied and pasted some from Facebook. Some were edited by me, some by the photographer, some are still raw. Enjoy!

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Caleb's vintage Johnny Carson suit is his father's wedding suit from 1979.