gone cross eyed

Howdy ya'll!! You guys ready for some pics from the week? No? Well, TOO BAD! Here they are coming atcha. But first: me. You likey? Yes? Awesome. Wanna go out later? Me and you. Maybe we could have a few beers and play some golf and see where the evening takes us? No? Fine. You're not my type anyway.

So, it's cold as heck here and I'm lovin' it. It was so cold (and rainy) today that I wore two dresses. Stripes and plaids, yo. My favorite combo. Well, the plaid dress is a cheapo online find that shrank several sizes after the first washing, so now it's really just a shirt. I haven't had a chance to get any warmer clothes for my still blubbery post-pregnancy body. I'm broke and car-less anyway so I'll probably be double layering dresses a lot this season.

Outfit Under $20

Plaid dress - www.599fashion.com

Striped dress and boots - handmedowns

Leggings - Walmart

Authentic Kuchi tribal earrings -www.tribalbazaar.com

Crochet flower brooch - made by Lou Lou! (Cedar's matching sweater below)

 I found these records today digging through some leftover stuff from our Church's rummage sale they hosted last weekend. Ten cents each! YEAH!

 Beers of the week:

 River's new favorite "toys".

What a nerd.

  I've been pretty unhappy with the thinness of my brows lately. I've never had a problem with them before and all of a sudden I felt that I needed to do something about them - I blame Pinterest. I suck at filling them in - I do it everyday and I still can't get it right so I browsed the web to see if there was such a thing as eyebrow stencils. And sure enough! 

Look! I got suckbrows! 

I think this whole eyebrow stencil thing would be better for me if the stencils were adhesive and if I had a darker brow pencil.. and friggin' knew what I was doing. 

So anywaaaaays... River wore polka dots and skinny jeans to church today. I had no idea how skinny those darn pants were when I got them. They look like dude leggings.

 And all in hot pink is Miss Cedar. Along with her thrifted $2 dress she's sporting a pair of 99 cent ruffle bloomers bought from China on Ebay. Thank you China for always being there for me. 

The dress is so fluffy! Doesn't her dress remind you of those dolls old ladies crochet to cover toilet paper rolls? 

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Ummm... sometimes this happens.

Bye!

LINKED UP HERE!

and now...

I am SO ready for autumn! I'm so excited about it my nerves are vibrating with anticipation. I'm ready for the weather, the layers, the smells, AH everything! But alas, autumn will not be here in Texas at least until November. It's been a rather "mild summer" here, averaging in the upper 90s but... ugh... that's plenty hot for me.

(Only 2 weeks left)

Saturday me and the husband went to have dinner with a nice couple from church at their home. Since it was hot AND I haven't shaved my legs in heaven knows how long, I had to reach for my trusty old maxi. Something nice and long to cover my gorilla legs.

 This dress was originally bought from Walmart for a wedding reception in NY and later worn for River's baptism. I liked it well enough when I bought it, but because of my watermelon belly I've been stuck wearing it a couple times a week as opposed to a couple times a month - so now I'm just plumb sick of it. Buuuuuut it's comfy and fits my huge boobies nicely so I can't complain too much about it.

  Dress: Walmart

Necklace: gift from belly dancer (ex)friend

Handbag: Merchant  from my renaissance faire last year

Bangles: ebay .99 each

So it turns out the wife from the couple we had dinner with Saturday is a bit of an eccentric and thrift shops for unique ethnic pieces like me. I honestly thought I was the only person that did that in this town and I RARELY have luck. I think I need to look a little closer and get out more often. Here are just a couple of items from her collection of goodies she's thrifted in the area. The shoes remind me a bit of trailer hitches but they're so unique!!! And a brass evening bag?? Um, YES!

 And then...

 The 4th annual Arklatex Comic Convention is this Saturday. I'm not a comic fan AT ALL but I loooove dressing up in costumes and comic nerds are often fans of renaissance faires so I like to use the opportunity to promote the faire. We didn't rent a table this year for the convention like we usually do. I don't think I'll be up to tending a table for eight hours in my current condition. Instead we're just going to take our time,  go to have fun, schmooze with the vendors and hand out faire flyers.

And here's my costume for the Con in the making. I'm not going to tell you what it is just yet. That's a surprise - but I will give you a hint. Feel free to guess if you want: It's a big bird from a Disney movie. If you keep up with Disney movies, then you've probably already guessed it. The costume is made from what used to be my all time favorite dress but after it's sixth washing (always air drying) it was time to retire the poor thing. The elastic fibers in the stretch lace are popping out all over, it's covered in fuzz balls that are entangled in the material and I've snagged the devil out of it a few times. But now it's getting new life as the most ridiculous costume I have ever made and boy, I can't wait to wear it!

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So what are your plans for this weekend???

but it's not a lot...

Wow it's been seven whole days since my last blog post. I usually read the blogs I'm following after I make a post, but since I haven't posted in a week that means I've missed 95 of your posts. 95?? Sheesh. What could you people possibly be up to out there?!?! 

So what have I been up to? Well, I cleaned my bathroom for the first time since Halloween. No lie. Now it's all pretty and sparkly and smelling oh-so nice. I have no idea how I let that much time pass between cleanings. 

The photo coming up is pretty irrelevant to anything I'm going to talk about - I just want to share with you this poster I have above the toilet. Isn't it fitting?? Flush art?

 Naruto Whirlpool by Utagawa Hiroshige, 1853

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I've been doing tons of faire work daily and this requires me to be in front of my laptop for hoooours as day. Often times I find myself getting a too riled up realizing all the things that need to be handled between now and October. I know that seems like a decent enough time to plan a renaissance faire but I've got a baby coming this summer so I've got to get as much done as possible. 

Sometimes I just need to step away and take a little breaky-poo.

Strolling around clearance shopping and shopping for 99 cent jewelry on Ebay has become my favorite things to do during a break. The other day at K-Mart I found these nail polishes super duper marked down for 78 cents each. The lime green rocks my world AND it's long lasting. I've gone since Sunday with barely a chiparoo.

I got this great necklace and and owl ring for 99 cents each on eBay. There's more jewelry to show but it didn't come in until after I started this post. 

Yesterday at Salvation Army I got this great handmade kid's blanket for River. It looks so fresh and new - I don't think it's ever been used.

 I got  two pairs of suspenders to add to the husband's man-ccessories collection. Now that he's starting to care a little bit more about fashion I can finally buy him the things I would wear if I were a dude.

 And lastly I got this great Southwestern themed cotton handkerchief... that I accidentally ripped after hastily tearing the price tag off to get this photo. Boo!

 

Well, the number of unread blog posts is now up to 102 on Bloglovin' and I gotta get back to work...

So I'm going to go away now.... ADIOS!!

tattered

I am a such a cheapskate when it comes to shopping. I bought this cute yellow wallet last year at Salvation Army for a couple bucks after carrying my last one until it disintegrated. Well, as you can see I did the same with this wallet. It wasn't until I was constantly finding my cards and driver's license on the ground and in the bottom on my purse that I realized: ugh, it's time for a new wallet.

While running errands yesterday I decided to stop by Salvation Army to seek out a new wallet. Honesty three dollars is actually more than I wanted to pay for this plain black wallet but it was the only one there that didn't look like it had been run over by a car.

So, of course if you're in a thrift store in search for just one thing, that doesn't mean you're going to walk out with just one thing...

I got this super cute heart print table cloth(?) crib sheet(?) Whatever it is, the edges are finished and the  possibilities for uses for this thing are endless. 

And duh, I got some books. I can't remember the last time I paid more than two bucks for a book. Eh, probably never.

I got this great purse for three dollars. It's pretty big - it'll be good for smuggling booze into the theater. I could probably even fit couple bottles of wine in there with room to spare for two glasses and a Subway foot-long and chips.

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Later that evening me and the family went to a friend's house for burgers. They have two kiddos;  one's a little younger than River and the other a little older so he had a blast playing with them. Poor thing doesn't get to to interact with other children since the majority of our friends with children have moved faaaaaaar away or got eaten by dragons.

Their little boy was super fascinated with River's hair and stroked it and patted it every chance he got.

Ok, party people. I'm off to rob some banks... and by rob some banks I mean clean the bathrooms for the first time since Halloween. See ya later!!

heave ho!

I got this dress at a street festival in Tarrytown, NY earlier this summer. It looked amazing on the mannequin but on me, it looks like one of my late-grandmothers house dresses.  I tucked it away in the closet until I could figure out how to make it look less... lazy hippie housewife-ish.

Since the weather was unseasonably warm yesterday, I decided to give it another shot. It's very lightweight so it worked perfect for my outings in the confused winter weather.

AND thanks to a new brand of bras I found online, my massive boobins were hoisted high enough for a little belt cinching (thanks also to a ridiculously tight tummy tucker I'm wearing under my clothes. Shhh... my little secret.)

Vest thingy: www.599fashion.com

Dress: NY street fest

Belt: Target clearance
Boots: Hand-me-downs

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Yesterday I decided to go out and do something that I truly hate to do: thrift shopping.

I'm sure you've heard enough complaining from me about how much the thrift stores here suck, so I'll spare you the dead horse beatings and state simply for my newest followers that... our thrift stores suck. But oddly enough I had a pretty decent run this time.

I'm not going to share pics of every dang thing I bought - I don't want to bore you, so here's just a few of my faves from my haul.

 

 This adorable vintage yellow dress is a RARE find since no one here sells vintage clothing. I found it at Goodwill. It whimpered and gave me big puppy dog eyes, crying, "Take me home please? No one wants me. They're going to throw me away if I don't sell just like all the other vintage dresses! Save me!"

It's several sizes too small for me but it's in absolute perfect condition so I'll probably list in in my shop so it can find a new owner - someone who will love her as much as I do.

 I also scored these strange floral faux alligator loafers for $1.50 at Good Samaritan charities.

 A much lusted after wool cape for $3

 And another rare vintage Goodwill find: A cute little lace hat.

I've been wanting a hat like this forever!!

At every shop I visited I made sure to snatch up every Christmas album I could find for an early Christmas present my husband surprised me with last week.

I asked for a new record play and that's what I got!

 It's a late 70s Curtis Mathes console in pristine condition. He didn't tell me the price but from what I understand, the shop owner was practically giving it away.

 My old record player was in such bad shape, my albums sounded like they were being played underwater so now I can finally listen to my favorite records and stop wasting my money downloading the music I can find for mere pennies at garage sales and flea markets!

Um... this particular Shins record didn't cost pennies though... It was a gift. There's no way I'm paying more than a dollar for an album. Man I'm cheap.

See you guys later. I'm off to the rain forest to find a cure for lupus and herpes.

Bye!